Want To Succeed, Follow All This....

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We all want to succeed in our professional lives. So here are some "cool" things to do if you want to be successful. I got it in my mail and indeed it made me smile. So because I smiled, I thought to share it with you all. There is one more email which made me jump over my chair and I was laughing while holding my stomach. I shall post the contents of it later. Have a read,

1. Rule 1. - The Boss is always right.

2. Rule 2. - If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.
3. Those who work get more work. Others get gals, pay, perks, and promotions.
4. P.H.D. stands for "Pull Him Down". The more intelligent a person, the more hard working a person, the more committed a person; the more number of persons are engaged in pulling that person down.
5. If you are good, you will get all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it!
6.. When the Bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
7. It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say you've done and what you are going to do.
8. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the backside.
9. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
10. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
11. If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
12. When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
13. Following the rules will not get the job done ever.
14. If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
15. Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous" .
16. No matter how much you do, you never do enough.
17. You can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work you are supposed to be doing.
18. In order to get a promotion, you need not necessarily know your job.
19. In order to get a promotion, you only need to pretend that you know your job.
20. The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.

So how was it? Do let me know ;-).

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