Thursday, December 31, 2009

Grant ‘Very Happy 2010’ To All….

Yes its a wrong syntax if we see it from a technical point of view but it sounds perfect still! Another year is ending and a new year is just on the doorsteps. I wish you all who come here a very happy and prosperous 2010 and the best of the holiday season! Hope this year brings the best of everything for you and becomes one of the most memorable and happening years of your life! Have a great new year evening either tonight or tomorrow night( depending on where you are on this planet) and have lots of fun :-) . 

I shall be posting the zodiac forecast of my sun sign Aquarius for 2010 as soon as it becomes available. So if you are also an Aqua, make sure you do check back this space some time later :-) . Hope planets move in the right manner in 2010 :-) .


I am still not able to find the 2010 horoscope and I shall be honest, I didn’t even try much hard as well. But I was just reading what in general Aquarians are, always a fun and feel of satisfaction to read that we are here to save and make this world a better place :-) ! Now how cool is that eh? Don’t believe me, read this!

My favorite lines,”Making the world a better place is a collaborative effort for Aquarians.The great strengths of the Aquarius-born are their vision, intellect and humanity. They are determined to make the world a better place and to help everyone they can along the way.” Am I that good, don’t think so LOL !

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Back & Injured….

I got back today from the last program of this year of  mine. I guess, I was just waiting for the program to get finished so that I could fly back to home asap! It was a little long to wait  I believe this time since I am out of home and on the roads from last many weeks. But, its finished and thank god, it went really well as well! That was biggest worry that it should not happen that the last program of the year would get screwed up! Thanks to god and the co-operation of all the delegates, it went really well. All the delegates were really nice and intelligent and said so many kind words before we finished the program! Thanks a lot guys! Now, all the programs are over, I guess at least for 2-3 days, I can have some rest which is must now since I, due to my very own stupidity, have injured myself as well. How come ? Well, keep on reading!

Since childhood, I have a talent of doing something which others can't even think of and when it happens, at times, even I wonder myself as well. The same happened just now as well. I was sitting on my chair and was trying to "play" while sitting over it by making it go backwards and swinging like this . I do it almost all the time and so far, nothing went wrong ever. But as its said, never say never, something went wrong today for sure! I don't know how I lost my balance and chair slipped and I hit the corner of a sofa chair. Well, it was a little "strong" hit as it lead me to have 3 stitches over the head :-( . Within minutes, everything got messed up! Thank god that my dad was at home today otherwise it would had been really tough for me to drive alone and go to doc. Not sure how come I messed up something which I am doing since so many years! But it got messed up really bad today! So that's what the reason that now I need some rest for sure. Its been almost 7 years when the last I had stitches over head and again, it was not my fault at that time. For the first time, I became unconscious , did block the entire road for about 2 hours. But still drove back home myself after getting stitches! Anyways, it was long time back. Hope I shall be fine soon. I didn't want to have stitches but doc(who is my dad's best friend as well) insisted for it so had no choice.  Hope they got cut soon which he has promised me as well. Hope my hair style won't get too messed up due to these unwanted "threads" :-) . But at the moment, its hurting and its hurting really bad!

I wish you all very happy holidays and merry Christmas as well! Have lots of fun and enjoy yourself! Hope the next year brings so many joys, happiness and success for you! I shall listen to some music now. Its the best way to forget about pain for a little while :-) !

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Sleepless Night, Yet Again....

I didn't get time to write before I was leaving this time. It wasn't long enough too that I was at home. I left the next day only after writing this. And there is no time that I could get in these days to write anything. Today also wasn't any exception as I am just so much tired and feeling so weak. By the time I am back in the hotel, I am in the position that I can fall anywhere. May be its too much travel that I am doing since last 2 months and/or the impact of constant travels are becoming visible. Not sure what is there? So what's the exception that I am writing at almost midnight today, you may ask! well, no other reason but that I can't sleep. After spending almost 3 hours on the back, turning upside down, there is no sleep in my eyes. There are so many thoughts in the mind, so many things going on that even though I am feeling so damn tired, I am still not able to get sleep for few moments even!

So what to do when you are not able to sleep? Read poetry and listen to music ;-)! Yep,I am doing the same right now despite knowing that its not going to get me sleep but will make me more awake! And sometimes, you get across something which shakes your soul even. I don't know to call me lucky or unlucky that at this moment when I was already not able to sleep and was getting bombarded with painful thoughts, I came across the following poetry which just shook me! Have a read,

Uske sapnon ko poora karne ki zidd thi meri Faraz,
Usne azzaadi maangi aur maine khud ko mita diya!

And here is its translation in Engish,

I was committed to make her every single dream come true,
She asked from me freedom and I got myself destroyed!

Some times, few words tell you a tale of a life time isn't it? Its going to be a long night tonight I guess!

Saturday, December 19, 2009


I got back just now. Though it was a tiring week still, the outcome came out very  nice! The delegates were very happy and spoke so many kind words about me that I don't even think I am even worthy even! Here is one comment that I recieved from one delegate which he posted on my oracle blog. I am posting the exact wording here as I believe, this is among the nicest sayings that I have heard,"

I can’t resist myself without saying that it was a very enriching experience for me,during these last Five days of our Training session on Oracle 11g New features.

Thanks once again Praaji! U r just awesome..!!

All I can say is thanks so much to all of you. I know nothing but despite that, it was very kind of all of you to say such nice words for me! I just can say thanks but believe me, I mean it when I am saying it!

I need some break but there is none at the moment. I need to travel again tomorrow for another program. Hopefully, this should be the last program of this year. There are some things which I came to know in this program of mine while talking to another fellow instructor, things which did prove that in this world, there are just selfish and self centered people and all alike this are bound to take a vow to hurt me. I don't know why on the earth people try to act smart even when they know that I am not a fool. Its just my nature that I don't bother at most of the times but I am not blind to see what is happening. I shall talk about it in a while. There are some pending tasks which I need to finish today itself before I leave. I shall just have another cup of tea and start all of them right away! If you want to join me for a cup of tea, you are most welcome :-) .

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Sleepless Night….

At times, when you need something so desperately and you don't get it, only that can understand what it feels like who have experienced it. After a long, extremely tiring day, with a bad health, how much sleep can help, its something which can't be explained. But unfortunately, sleep and peace are among those few things which nothing and no one can get for you even if you are the wealthiest person of this planet! I certainly am not the wealthiest person so I am not saying it for myself but isn't it same for those people who really have that much of wealth? Just like that being in crowd doesn't mean that one is not alone and sitting all by yourself doesn't mean that you are alone! No, its not a tongue in cheek. Its really true, just depends how much one did understand this statement.

I am not having a good time. Though the delegates are very nice, intelligent and cooperative, still the complexity of the module, tiredness that I have accumulated from constant , several weeks of travel and on top of all, my own health not being well, all of these are making somehow the entire thing a real rough ride for me! I want to sleep so desperately at this moment when I am writing this post but there is no sleep in the eyes. I am feeling so much pain but even after having the pain killer, its not showing any signs of going anywhere far from me! And to make things much more worse, the endless painful thoughts are coming in mind! I am not sure what to do at the moment, how to get some sleep and rest which I desperately need at this moment since I need to look fresh tomorrow! But not sure why, where and how sleep, rest and peace have managed to skill all the routes just towards me! Wish, I could just had a power off button which I could press for 15seconds and shut the entire thing off! That would had come real handy right :-) !

So if I am not able to sleep, any guesses what I am doing then? Yes listening music and reading poetry collection of mine! Just read two pieces of poetry and felt like sharing them here. Both are in Hindi but I shall explain the meaning in English as well in a while. First, the Hindi version,

Jitni shiddatt se mujhe usne jakhm diye hain Faraz,

Itni shiddatt se to maine use chaha bhi na tha!

And here is its meaning in English,

With the  intensity she gave me all wounds,

I even didn't love her with that intensity!

And here is the second, a bit long one with its Hindi version,

Mujhe aazmaane waale, mujhe aazma k roye,

Meri daastaan-e-hasrat suna suna k roye!

Teri bewafaion par, teri kaj adaion par,

Kabhi sar jhuka kar, kabhi munh chhupa kar roye!

Jo suani anjumann mein shab-e-gham ki aapbeeti,

Kabhi ro k muskraye, kabhi muskra k roye!

Main hun be-watan musafir, mera naam bekasi hai,

Mera koi bhi nahin jo gala laga k roye!

Mere paas se guzare mujhe undekha kar k,

Main yeh kaise maan lun k wo duur ja kar roye!


And here is the meaning of it in English,

Those who wanted to test me, after testing me they cried,

While reciting my tale, every moment they cried!

At times on your betrayals, at time on your unfaithful attitude,

I cried some time with my head down, some time covering my face!

When I depicted my tale of the sad night,

Smiled some times after crying, some times cried after smiles!

I am no one, my name is curse,

There is no one whom I can hug and cry!

She passed by side without even looking at me,

How can I believe she did cry after going at some distance!

I have no words to add to what the above is saying. There is a lot that's said already in both of the above poetries. I guess, I should go to bed and wait to see if I can catch some sleep because my work is not over yet. Hope at least sleep shows some kindness and shows up!

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Birthday, Travel.…

I can't seem to think any other title for a post which is for two different topics! Anyways, first about the birthday! Its my sister Gunjan's birthday today! Happy birthday dearest Gudia! Its just a shame that I need to travel on this day. I really want to be here with her, spending the entire with her but I need to go for this tour! Despite that I won't be able to spend time with her, I am still somewhat happy as I could be here on her birthday at midnight to wish her. Last time also,I was absent and I didn't want to repeat the same thing this year! We did cut cake at 12:00am last night! She wanted to get some stuff for her and was waiting for me to get it for her! So yesterday, I took her along and got what she wanted! Though I am not completely dissatisfied but I am still not happy at all! But I am helpless and I need to go at any cost! God bless you Gudia! Happy birthday dearest Gudia!

Well, needless to say that I am traveling also today. Its really going to be a very tough tour! I just hope that all goes well. Bag is packed and I myself shall be getting ready in a while. Pray for me guys! I need all the wishes and prayers of yours!

Saturday, December 12, 2009

An Awesome Song, Kamal Heer's Jindey Ni Jindey....

Punjabi music has always been enriched with so many talented singers, musicians and writers. Despite the fact that now a days, just every one wants or tries to be a Punjabi singer, writer or musician, there are some names without which Punjabi music and its essence can't be there. I always feel that music should reflect completely and truly human emotions. That's what the music is all about after all, isn't it? And what good would be that music which except reflecting emotions , does everything else? Sadly there are some singers who do make such kind of music. But fortunately, there are some musicians who do prepare such numbers which just gets mixed in your soul! There isn't just one name and among these talented musicians, Waris brothers trio, Manmohan Waris , Kamal Heer and Sangtar hold a very esteemed and respected position!

Though all three brothers are involved completely with music but all bring their own signature in the music which they create. If Manmohan is more focussed on traditional kind of music and Sangtar limiting himself to music composition only, Kamal Heer brings the music which appeals more to the dancing generation. His songs are more foot tapping ones, making them completely suitable for clubs. But still, he doesn't miss to bring in his albums at least one such number which shows his singing talent and ability to pick good lyrics as well, two most important ingredients needed for creating a long lasting song. And he has just repeated the same act with his new single, Jindey Ni Jindey . Jindey or more precisely,  Jind is a Punjabi word which means life in English. Its very common to see the lyricists depicting the beloved as life in their songs. The same is there for this song as well but this song brings the emotions of a broken hearted lover who is calling his beloved and is telling her that what is he going through. The song is penned by Jasvir Gunachauria, one of the most amazing writers whose sad songs can bring tears in the eyes of most stone hearted people as well. The song has come very nice and I believe, this song would just add another feather in Kamal Heer's cap! The song's official video is released and is available on Youtube. I am posting the video here as well for your ease. I have been told that there is one more video of this song that would be getting released very soon. Once I shall come to know about it, I shall post that as well. Un till then, here is the currently available video,

The song is in Punjabi. As usual, I shall be explaining the meaning of it in English. But first, here are the Punjabi lyrics,

Jindey ni jindey tere, waade dukh dinde tere,
Tuttadi na yaadan di ladi, disdi aen baari ch khadi!
Jindey ni jindey tere(repeat)
Jindey ni jindey tere(repeat)

Ambar ton taare waangu tutteyan da nai tikana,
Saada tere ishq de hathon lutteyan da nai tikana,
Jindey ni jindey asin,
Jakhmi parinde asin!
Dunia te ghadi do ghadi, disdi aen baari ch khadi!
Jindey ni jindey tere, waade dukh dinde tere!
Jindey ni jindey tere, waade dukh dinde tere!

Machde saahin angiaare, tadpe ni Gunachauria!
Aaunde tere chete laare, tadpe ni Gunachauria!
Jinde ni jinde moti,
Sadhraan de khinde moti!
Tutti maala hathaan ch fadi, disdi aen baari ch khadi!
Jindey ni jindey tere, waade dukh dinde tere!
Jindey ni jindey tere, waade dukh dinde tere!
Tuttadi na yaadan di ladi, disdi aen baari ch khadi!

And here is the English translation,

Oh my life, your promises are giving me pains,
Endless memories are not letting me rest, You appear to be standing at the window!

Like a broken star from the sky, I have no place to go,
After being destroyed from your fake love, I have no place to go!
Oh my life, I,
I am like a wounded bird!
Would be here on this earth for just few moments, You appear to be standing at the window!

Even the breaths are burning, Gunachauria is getting tortured!
Always after recalling your fake promises, Gunachauria is getting tortured!
Oh my life, pearls!
Pearls of the desires are just scattered all over!
And I am just standing, holding the broken chain of those pearls!
Oh my life, your promises are giving me pains,
Endless memories are not letting me rest, You appear to be standing at the window!

Love is the most beautiful gift and beloved is the most powerful and closet support that one can have! But in the same manner, love can give the most brutal wounds to someone and only someone whom you love, can give you endless tears which don't go away no matter how hard you try! If a normal friend of yours, still the pain comes but when your beloved leaves you for some selfish reasons, the pain which comes from that wound is unexplainable and unbearable! There can't be any bigger happiness than knowing that there is someone who loves you and there can't be anything more hurting and painful than knowing that whom you loved with all what you had, she never loved you and for some materialistic things, leaves you alone like someone throws away his old toys after playing with them for some time! Lots of people mention that they are in love, but only few truly fall in it because being in love is not making calls in every hour or meeting on every evening. Being in love is not writing the name of the beloved on your books and being happy telling others that you are in love. Being in love is to smile even when your beloved hurts you the most knowingly! Being in love is even when you see not getting a call from your beloved which you could expect only from your beloved and she tells you that he couldn't do because she was busy! Being in love is being in tears from so many pains given by your beloved but still forgetting all of them and smiling hearing her saying, I love you! Being in love is not leaving your beloved's hand on a lonely road seeking for a better career, prosperous future but rather giving away your head for the sake of it! That's what is being truly love, something which is much easier said than done! And that's why I say, love is not the bed or path of roses but its an ocean of fire which one has to swim through to get to the other end! Love is giving all what you have for the sake of your love and beloved and yet to feel complete! Love is not saying that you never made a promise of doing something which doesn't even need the seel of a promise in the first place but giving all of yourself for even those words which you said just like that! That's what is love, that's what is being in love!

I loved this song so much that since the time I came to know about it( saw its promos on television), I am just playing it non-stop. I do hope that you too like it as well! And last but not the least, thanks Kamal Heer for brining this song!

At Least A Day's Rest....

I got back home this morning. Its my sister's birthday tomorrow and I wanted to be there to wish her. That's why despite that my mom asked me to stay back, I insisted on coming back. I shall be leaving again tomorrow and this time, this would be a REALLY hard module that I would be taking up. I am not at all sure what would happen as I know from the past experiences of two other instructors that the ride isn't going to be smooth at all for me(neither it was for them ). I am scared and worried to death! And on top of that, I am feeling completely burnt out from the travel. Feels like that I am completely exhausted! And its not just the physical fatigue, there is some sad feeling that's there in the heart as well and the reason for that is this and the next month. I can't mention the story behind these months but its really hard for me smile at the moment. Wish I could learn the tricks like some other people to be just completely caring about your own work and nothing and no one else! But I know, I shall never be able to learn this!
Anyways, the last module went really well. All the delegates were really nice and I just thank all of them for their kind words that they spoke for me and for my work. Thanks a bunch guys. Though I am not worthy at all for such nice words but still heartiest thanks to all of you! This world is really such a small place and some how, I experience this thing time and time again! The same happened in this session as well when I came to know that one of the delegate has studied with a close friend of mine. Another lady is from Punjab and her father used to work there before they moved to Delhi permanently. And one delegate worked as the Asia Pacific head for the Human Resource division and some how, I used to read his team's blog (about which I came to know eventually that it was his effort to start it). Some how, it just felt so nice! I had a great time and I hope, the delegates also didn't get bore of me :-) .
I have one day and there is still a lot left for me to do. I shall have my breakfast and than, a busy-yet-not-busy day starts ;-) .

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

A Travel Not So Well Started....

If you are a regular here, you would be aware about the fact that the travel which I am doing at the moment, I was not supposed to be a part of it if I hadn't been called for it on an "urgent and desperate" basis. I said a No for the program initially but than I was given so many reasoning's that why I should go for it. So I had to say Yes for it unwillingly, resulting which caused chaos right in the beginning of it only because anything that starts with a no ends up being in trouble. Try it for once, you would realize that its true!
At my place, since last 4 days, the environment has become really violent and dangerous thanks to some idiots who think creating mess and destroying peace is the best way to spend their free time. Things have gone to that extent of being messed up that a curfew has been imposed and army is called up. Completely the movement is stopped. Whatever little movement which is allowed is only for few hours. Overall, things are really so much bad and there are no signs of any improvement being visible in the near future as well. And yours truly had to start his travel in this kind of environment only. Normally I travel by bus but this time my flight was quite early so I was given a train. I have traveled already by train but this time there was a slight change in the plans as the train given to me was not the usual one. This leaves after about 2 hours from the timing of my usual train and takes a complete 6 hours to reach Delhi which for the other is only 4.5hours. Well, I didn't like it in the very first place so I thought I would go by bus only. My dad comes with me to drop me always and this time also he was with me. We stopped at the bus stand from where I take the bus all the time only to see that the entire place is looking like a police station and is completely filled up by so many cops. I asked one cop that is there a curfew still going on and with his answer, my heartbeats actually went faster. He said yes and also that the chances of getting a bus are slim to almost none. I thought of going to Delhi via bus that plan also didn't work as there was no bus allowed to move on that path. The last option which me and dad thought was to go to the station only and see if trains are moving. Finally, we headed to the same place where we didn't want to go at all. But there was no other choice and eventually, this proved to be a wise decision only.
When we got at the train station, dad checked that the train was on right time and there was indeed a movement of trains. Actually we were worried that what if the movement of the trains is also blocked? But fortunately that was not the case. The train came and it did come on its right time only. I was so much worried about dad that how would he get back to home in this all messed up environment but he assured me that he would reach safely( and he did as well) . I started my travel for Delhi thinking that now the worst is over. As like always, probably I did say it way too early.
When my train just crossed Ambala, it stopped all of a sudden. Well, it was stopping for about 2 minutes at almost every station so the first impression that now also its the same case. But when 2 minutes turned into 10 and then 10 to 30, things appeared to be wrong some where. It was now about 40 minutes and no one was having any clue what is happening? Finally, we asked some train staff who told us that a train of goods has been slipped off from the track and has blocked the entire path as well. Upon asking that how much time it would take to clear the track, the answer was about 2-3hours. Okay, this was surely not right as my flight was supposed to leave in next 5 hours and just when you don't want, it was on right time as well. I thought ( and was suggested as well) to leave the train and take a bus after walking for some time. But than I rejected that idea as the road was pretty far from where I was at that moment and time that would had taken to get to the road and than to take the bus probably would had come close to the same time which was supposed to be taken in the clearance of the track. So taking a big risk, I decided to stay in the train and  am just glad that I chose to do so as in the next 10 minutes, finally the train was moving again. I was late by complete one hour but still, I could make it to the flight. Finally, I said to myself, things are okay now. Again, it proved to be a before-time statement!
The train did reach to delhi but stopped just before it could touch the platform, thanks to some signal which was red. Well, now it was 3.45pm and I was having a flight leaving at 5.20pm. It takes about an hour from the station to the airport. And by this calculation, there was no way that I could catch my scheduled flight. Well, as soon as I got off from the train, I grabbed my luggage and just ran towards the exit so that I can catch some auto or cab and can start for the airport. I got an auto whom  I asked to drive in the fastest possible manner for an extra 50 bucks. He did keep his words and drove the auto like a jet and out of nowhere, made it possible that I was at the airport at 4.15pm, in just 30minutes! I just rushed towards the check-in counter where the lady told me that there are no window seats available so would I like to choose from a mid or aisle seat? To which I just could say, you have no idea how did I make it today to come to the airport, what ever you give today is okay for me :-) . She gave me a fake smile and handed over the boarding pass. After the security check was over, it was already 4.50pm and I just rushed towards the boarding gate as the boarding already was started. All said and done, now I was sitting on seat in the plane. Somehow, I just made an impossible looking task possible :-) .
The matter of flight was over but there was another matter which was still unresolved and that was of my stay. I had no stay confirmed for me yet and I was sitting in my flight! After making about 20calls, I finally got a text message from the travel lady that where I am going to stay! Thank god the hotel is good and on top of everything, has an internet connection. But its not possible that if some thing is good for me, it can stay longer. I have been told today that there is a guest house which is now booked for me( why I wasn't told this thing before) and now I need to shift to that place. And I have no idea how would it be possible for me when I am working since morning 8am to evening about 9pm. But the chances are pretty strong that I am out of options so I need to do it by some way. Again, the guest house won't be good( I know) because of one main reason that it won't have the internet and not having that for a computer geek is like being out of breath for a normal person! Even the food won't be good compared to where I am at the moment. Let's see what happens? Hope things would not go any more wrong now, fingers are crossed!

Saturday, December 05, 2009

Time To Be On The Road( Yes Again)....

If you would ask me, I am really not in any mood to go this time. And its just not like that because there are two reasons for this. One and the most important I guess, I am not well. If you have been reading, I did mention that I am having so much of pain in my throat since my last travel ( which just got finished only 2 days back) and had become even worse because I didn't get any rest and in that state only, I had to "shout" for  3 days. I did go to the doctor only to hear that I need some rest but who can explain this to him that when some one writes saying that "only Aman", there is nothing much you can do. I really really do need some rest because the pain is unbearable for me but I am out of choices here. The second reason is also pretty close to the first one. I am traveling since last 5 weeks and if you don't do this much of travel, you can't feel how much impact it does on one's body. I want some rest to make myself get relaxed but again, there is no chance of it, at least not in the next coming few weeks. To sum up, I am leaving again tomorrow. When you are not willing to do something, it appears a lot harder than it actually is and that's the same I am feeling now. Anyways,one got to do what one got to do so its okay. Time now to pack bags, books, computer! Hope at least today I get some sleep which is has simply forgotten to come to me since last few days. Pray for me guys and wish me luck! If you are on vacation or are going to be, happy holidays!

A Heart Touching Poetry, Truly Awesome....

Some times, there are some things which are not explainable by words. Even when one tries really hard enough to explain through wording, all those efforts just fail. If you are thinking that what can be such emotion which is not explainable by words than the answer of that is pain. Out of all, only pain is that such emotion which even words can't describe properly. And when that pain is given to one by that person whom he loved more than his own self than it becomes even more harder to tell someone what's the reason of those tears which at times come in the eyes. Its not possible to explain in any words that why one feels alone even when the whole world is there? Its not possible to express that pain caused by those broken pieces of heart which pierce into the soul all the time reminding that this is the punishment of trusting, loving , caring for some one for whom love was not much than a wardrobe which one wears for some time and after that, just throws away in a corner. Only that person can truly understand this who has tasted the same poison. Those who cause this pain and these tears to others, for them its nothing and they never can understand even what it feels like to hide in the corner of your room and cry when you see that someone who is having wounds, not on his body but on his soul, how would you see those hidden pains? How you would look beyond what's visible? The answer of this lies in those eyes which despite being quite will reveal it all. Look in those eyes who would tell you that when pains go beyond the limits of tolerance, how would one feel? Don't get fooled by the smile of someone. Remember, smile can be fade but eyes never tell a lie, even when you want them to do so!

I got the following lines in an email. I am not sure who wrote these lines but I must say that whosoever did it, has done it in just an awesome manner! What that heart feels who got crushed under the feet of that person whom it was keeping safe inside of it,  is explained just so very beautifully here. These are in Hindi and I have attempted to explain the meaning in English as well. Have a read, first in Hindi,

Na jaane dhoondtey ho Kya meri viraan aankhon Mein,
Chupa rakhe Hum ne to kayi tufaan aankhon Mein!

Kahan who shokhiyan pehlay Si,ab kuch bhi nahin baaqi,
Chale aaye ho tum Kya khojne in be-jaan aankhon mein!

Kisi ka haath lekar haath mein jab tum mile hum se,
To kaise toot ke bikhra tha mera mann aankhon mein!

Na samjho chup hain to tum se koi shikwa nahi baaqi,
Hum apne dard Ki nahi rakhte koi pehchaan aankhon mein!

Mile the baad muddat k humein tum ajnabi ban Kar,
To kaise dard na Uthte meri hairaan aankhon mein!

Nahi ab phir se Koi raafta rakhne se kuch haasil,
Ke ab dafna diye hum ne sabhi armaan in aankhon Mein!

And here is the translation in English for the same,

Not sure what you are looking for in my lonely eyes,
There are just so many storms hidden beneath these eyes!

There is no innocence left in these eyes anymore,there is nothing else left,
What you have come to look for in these lifeless eyes!

When holding hands of someone else you met me,
You don't know how did my heart crushed into pieces beneath these eyes!

Don't think that if I am silent, there are no grudges for you,
No signs of my pain I keep anymore in these eyes!

When even after so long, you met me like a complete stranger,
Than how come pain won't come in my surprised eyes!

There is no benefit of keeping anything now,
As I have just buried all of my wishes beneath these eyes!

I don't know what else I should add to above said? I guess this world is now full of those for whom, their own self matters the most than anyone else, including those as well who love them, care for them! May be that's why people don't really look beyond what they think is right for them, even when it may mean to break someone's heart like breaking a cup of tea. May be some things like a better career, study in abroad really do matter than those stupid and idiotic things like emotions, feelings and love! Anyways, all I know is that if there are many who don't even think for a moment before leaving their beloved ones for what their own wishes and benefits, there are still few who have left the whole world for that one person whom they loved truly, madly and deeply. That's another fact altogether that out of those very few, there are again some very very selective lucky ones who got someone who understood this gesture of them. For the rest of the people, tears, pains and cries become their soul mates for the eternity and that's what is the fortune of most who does the crime of being in love!

Thursday, December 03, 2009

No More Wires....

In case, you don't know, I work in hi-tech field of computers and when I say, hi-tech, it means all the things that a normal person wont do with his machines. Though I am much far from what Sidhu and Vaibhav do in the same category and how much they know ( read Vaibhav's blog to know about what kind of cpu cabinet he uses, that should be enough to give you a heart attack) but still, I do come in the same category. So following the tradition of being wireless,which is already going on for sure at Sidhu's place and I am almost certain at Vaibhav's place as well about using internet over laptops and deskops , I have enabled wireless networking in my home as well today. I have already been warned by Ankit so I won't forget this time. Credit must go where its truly deserved. So keep on reading who are those unsung heroes who helped me in achieving wi-if nirvana.

Since I wanted to have wi-if setup in my home so who can be the best source around me to ask for the initial information about it than Sidhu! So doing a rightful thing, I asked him and he said its a piece of cake and all one need is a wireless router. But he made it certain that the router must be from Cisco. There is a complete range of it given by Linksys and Sidhu has the router from the same vendor only. He asked me to get the router only from this vendor only and I asked him to get one for me. Due to his business, he asked another common friend Ankit who went and bought this next-gen router for me. Thanks a bunch Ankit for all the effort.

As I was at Sidhu's place last night, so I asked him to do the test run of it there only. Sidhu did the test, with me and Ankit looking above his shoulders to see what's going on , and finished the entire setup in about 15 minutes.  Once confirmed that the device works, I packed it as the final test would had been at my home which was going to be this router's home as well for the rest of its electronic life.

I got at my home and after taking a cup of tea, I asked customer support of my broadband service to help me in setting up the device. Sadly, the guy had no clue what to do so he confirmed an engineer's visit at my place for tomorrow who would do it for me. Well, I didn't have patience to wait for tomorrow so I called up Sidhu. By this time, I had done some playing around with the settings already, thanks to my chat with that support guy. So the stage was almost set when I made Sidhu incharge. In less than a minute, the wi-if was up and running and I confirmed it by using the web over my phone. Its just a great feeling to have this kind of set up at your home, well at least its for me is a great feeling! So I am going to see how I can take use of this wireless nirvana now? Should be a lot of fun ;-) .

Short Lived Happiness....

Well, I have just got back home and yes, I am happy, in fact  I was very very happy when I was starting the travel today for home thinking that I shall be having a break(finally) for some time to get some rest. But just like always, if I want some thing, that is bound for not to happen in any case. And just the same did happen within just one hour of me coming back when I got a call that I am "requested very desperately" for a program and just me and only me has to handle that program. So I have to leave now on this Sunday AGAIN! Am I upset, yes I am just SO MUCH UPSET! Some one asked me a question few days back in a session that won't it be better if I shall be at one place now as its been so many years of me living in a suitcase? I didn't give the answer at that time. Okay I did give but I guess, probably I need to modify it a bit now with this yes that I am thinking to feel the same and I believe on one thing very strongly, if you need to think about what you are going to do or what you are doing and a question comes in your mind that when would be right time to leave that thing, probably that right time has just come when this thought came in your mind! So with that principle, I believe time for me to leave this is near, if not very near!

My doctor is waiting for me at his place for my throat checkup. Let's see what news he has to give to me. Got already an upsetting one and certainly not in a mood to hear anymore. Hope he won't say too! Some times, I just....never mind!

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Tired, Upset & Sick….

No, all these words are not for rhyme. I am experiencing all the above mentioned things, right at the same moment! I am at Sidhu’s place, after so many days, a place where I did have some good food and felt a bit better after so much of stress, tensions and to put the last cherry on the cake, sickness which is still there.


I have just finished the session today. Needless to mention that one when is travelling from couple of weeks( this is the 5th week) , its just simply obvious that he is going to end up, not being just tired but like DEAD TIRED! And I am the same kind of tired at the moment. But that too is not such a big thing for me because at the moment, there is some thing which is going on in my mind and that is the reason for me being upset as well. Some how, some way, its just always that due to others and just due to other people only I get the maximum tensions, pains and needless to say, upsetting feelings and today was no exception to this tradition. I am not well( read below to know why I am saying this) and due to my sickness, it actually was just so much hard for me to deliver the session at all, especially in this week. But if you know me, you must be aware about this fact about Aman that he never gives up, especially when there is a moment of responsibility. So I didn’t even mention this thing to the delegates and to anyone else too. Only my family members are aware that what I am going through health wise yet I tried my best to make sure that the session goes well and it did happen. I was fortunate enough to hear some really good and kind comments from few delegates for which I am really not worthy but just can say thanks in return. Anyways, all can’t go well and just the same happened. I can’t mention here the exact thing as this would just bring more flames for me and I am in no mood to get any more “false” blames over my head when in real, I have nothing to do with the issue in any damn way whatsoever! But still, just to be precise, I am accounted responsible for something for which I am not at all accountable. But no one is listening and despite that I have got such a good rating, that all is over shadowed by a stupid, really stupid issue which is not even remotely related to Oracle but is of logistics. Wish life could think of being a bit kind for me, not asking for a lot but just a bit only! Is it just too much to ask for or I am not just worthy to have any moment of smiles at all, not sure!


From the last 4 days, I am having just so much of pain in my throat. And its not pain, its actually making me not able to speak at all. Even speaking few words is like killing me. Now you understand why I mentioned that it was much harder for me to deliver the session! And I have no idea what has happened as well and neither I had any time to go and get myself checked up as well. And just to make things spicy, some one mentioned a really scary cause which I am just hoping is not true because if that’s true, I may be a guest of just few days over this planet earth :-) . Let’s see what happens when I shall finally get some time to go and see a doc.


Its almost midnight and Sidhu is asking me when I shall finish? And even I am feeling so much tired so I shall just go to bed as well. Tomorrow another travel is waiting for me but I am actually looking forward for it as its for home, the sweet home :-) .