Friday, May 14, 2010

TGIO(Thank God Its Over)….

Yes its actually TGIF but for me its TGIO only since I am in a really upset mood now. Thankfully, its not from the session. The session is going good and is almost going to finish now. I am sitting in my session only. The guys are really good and friendly and we had some really good discussions, both about oracle and other topics as well. I am eager to see the rating and hoping that its going to be good. Other than this, since the time I have come here, there were only problems and issues that I am seeing.

I am at Kolkata at the moment. I had to come over here on Sunday since the session was going to start on Monday. Though the module is very tough, I was still quite confident that all is going to remain fine. I was sitting in my room quite calm when I got a call from my colleague who called up to tell me some other stuff but when she came to know that I am going to Kolkata, the entire topic of the conversation got changed and she told me that its going to be a tough session since few trainers in the past had a very tough time there. I was so shocked and to some extent quite worried as well hearing all that. She asked me to contact a very senior trainer who is from the same place and has already taken many sessions for the same customer and she suggested that I should ask from him some tips about how to deal with this session? Well, it was quite late so I decided to call that instructor tomorrow. To my surprise, that instructor,even had never met with me, knew about me and mentioned that he had heard lots of good things about me as well. I was so surprised to hear that he had read some of my very old discussions over the internet with few other oracle professionals too! He also mentioned that he knew about me and heard about me since 2008 but its just a matter of chance that we never could meet and even on that day, he had just come to that city in the morning from where I was leaving in the afternoon :-O !I was so shocked but I said thanks and also this that he must not believe all what he has heard about me since I am not really good but he said, no you don’t need to be modest Aman! Its always good to hear kind words about you but somehow, I don’t want to hear good things but things where I lack so I am always a little uncomfortable hearing those sweet, good good words about me :-) . Anyways, we talked over the phone for about an hour or so and he did give me so many tips and also shared lots of his experiences, hearing all really did help me to prepare my own strategy. That’s another story that I totally forgot about the strategy and did handle the class the way I always do, without any preplanning or something and so far, it has gone okay only. Even when I was here, two days back, one another instructor came to me when I was taking my lemon tea and asked, are you Aman to which I (obviously) said yes :-) . He also said to me that I have heard a lot about you and I just wanted to meet you. Again, I did say to him the same thing that he must not believe what he has heard about me since people are just so kind to talk all the goodie goodie stuff about me but I am not really that great! To which he replied, you don’t need to tell me since I know how good are you! I can’t tell how good it felt to hear that but still, I must keep my feet on ground and focus on those points where I lack not brag/be proud about those where I am okay , so I just smiled and came back to my classroom.

How good it would be if all the times or atleast most of it, would remain in the happy state only. But that’s certainly not the case with me that I can be and stay happy for a long time.

If you are a regular here, you must know that I mentioned about a change in the professional life of mine which I was thinking, if would happen , would be good! But before it would had happened, I was  awarded with the ACE award. Also, I did meet and ask lots of other people about the offer and whether I should take it or not? Well, not even a single person said to me that its a really great thing that has come to me. Moreover, my current company’s manager is not at all ready to leave me as well and when we talked about this matter over the phone, he gave me some really good reasons to think twice about the entire thing. I certainly don’t ever would like to go from here having a bad taste in my mouth after all of these years which I have spent here. Irrespective of the small differences which I believe do exist everywhere, he did help me at that time when I really really needed it. If it had not been him, I have no idea what me and my family would had done. So even though its a truth that there are not any personal relations in work, I still do believe that I owe him big time. May be its not really like this since I only got for which I worked and nothing came to me as a help (neither I would had accepted it in that way too) but still, I feel that I must not go from here by doing a fight with all and ruining all what has come after so many years of work relationship. So thinking all this, I did tell people at the other end that I don’t think its a good thing to just ditch him and come with them. Well, this is where things started getting rusty.  A lot was said to me, including this as well that XYZ company will survive if me and my current company won’t be there and also, the people of XYZ company would still learn if I won’t teach them too! Those who know me, are aware about this fact that I am not a sort of person who would ever feel proud over any achievement of mine or would feel that there is just me and no one else! So I never could even think about those things which I was hearing. Though I wanted to give a reply but I just kept quite. I was also told that it may happen that I would never get any other offer from XYZ company which again, for me, came as a little surprising thing since as long as I have not been caught doing something which is against the norms of the company, there can’t be any reason that if there would be a vacancy and I would qualify for it, than too I won’t be accepted or would be offered the position just because I had declined another offer? Well, I don’t know how far its correct but I have stopped thinking about it, If that’s so than be it! There is not one company only in this world and there is not just position and if I am good in what I do, there is no reason that I won’t get work to do or a job to keep me alive! Still, I didn’t say anything and just mentioned that I shall again go and talk to my current manager and will see what he would say? I have not got a chance to talk to him yet but I shall do it for one more time for sure before I shall give my final reply. But that would happen when it would happen, whatever was said to me on that day over the phone, it really did hurt me and make me upset so much! That much that its now the third day since it all happened but I am still not able to get it completely out of mind and could get relaxed! Sigh!

This was not enough I guess for me to be upset when I got call from my sister that my mom is not well and had gone to see the doctor on an immediate basis! Since my mom is having some really serious health issues, it just shakes my entire self when I hear that she is not well even this much! I did call to that doctor whom she went to enquire that how she is. He did tell me that she is having some acids increased in her body which is not a good thing given that she has quite a lot of other health issues as well. He asked her to get couple of tests done which she has got done yesterday. Now, all what we need is the report to come and I just so hope that it would come out clean! I just can’t wait for the tests to come since I am getting so restless but I have no other choice as well except waiting. So will do and also would pray that all would go fine!

Its the last day of my session and I shall be leaving from here in another 10 minutes. I have to fly to Delhi today where I shall stay with Sidhu for a day. I don’t know what’s the status of my next week’s travel so I shall spend one day at his home. Its been a long time since I have met him so hope it will be a good time spent on weekend with him and Ankit! Though my tensions are not over yet but still I am feeling a little relaxed thinking that at least this week’s session is over today and I am free for the next two days and I just hope that it stays like this only for the next few days. Let’s see what happens!

I guess the guys are almost done so I shall be completing the formalities for the last day of the session before closing it now. After this, a small walk to the guest house and than a short drive to the airport! Oh and I just completely forgot, just on the day when I landed here, I bought a really nice tie from the airport which I forgot in the plane only! GRRR!! How could I be so stupid I don’t know. It never did happen but I don’t know how come I just became totally unaware about it un till I didn’t come in my room but by the time it was too late! I really did like it and thought that I shall wear it on the first day of the session. Heck why did I recall it now, I don’t know! I better get going before I forget that I am in the class still and guys are waiting for me to close the session!


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