Saturday, July 26, 2008

Back But Leaving, Extremely Tired & Upset....

Yes I am really so much of both. I got back home today but I need to start in the morning tomorrow again. Its been since morning 5am that I am traveling and I got back home at 6pm. Now I don't normally travel in the day while coming back. I take an evening or night flight and travel back to home in the night only. I was not supposed to come back today as my initial program was for 2 weeks. But the next week's program got canceled and as per my information, I didn't have any program next week. So I thought I shall travel this time in the day and instead of staying awake in the night, which normally happens , I would catch some sleep. But that all got changed and what I thought about taking rest wont happen now. The reason for me being tired is that I didn't sleep at all last night as I was just looking at the watch so that I wont miss my flight and in the travel today , again I couldn't sleep. Well that's okay as it does happen in the travel all the time but the sleepless night added much more to it than the usual one. Now why it wont happen that I can't take rest as planned, you must be thinking right? Well I came to know yesterday that I am assigned one program which someone else was going to do but because she is not feeling well, now I have to do it. And that's the reason for me being upset. I am not that kind of person who wouldn't like to help others in their tough times but its not just give-give all the times. If you are helping someone in their tough times, you expect the same for you too when you are not feeling well and can't do a program. But at that time, you are told that you have given a commitment and its not possible to break it now. You are given all sorts of examples that when that person was in the same condition how he managed, how should you manage? But when its about others than all that preaching just hides some where and sense of helping one in tough time comes up and no I am not talking about myself. I am a fair kind of person, I believe in , you get only what you give. So if one has helped me, by all means I shall try to help him/her even going out of the line but if one doesn't show up for me and that happens every single time, its really tough that willingly I shall do some thing for him/her then. And that's the same is happening at the moment too as I am pushed to do this by someone else. Well no issues as I shall be doing some thing which I really like to do so no big issues but yes it is making me upset and really upset if you ask me. So now I am back for a night but I shall be leaving again tomorrow. Lets see how things will go now in the program? I am not really in myself these days which is really not a good sign for the program. Lets see what happens? Pray for me guys! Really need all of them!

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