A Not-So-Good Day….
I am writing this after finishing the packing of the bag. It has been a really upsetting day since the starting of it and I am still in a very bad and upset mood! I just finished tea and I even forgot to put sugar in it and didn’t realize it at all because was thinking about tons of things. With a really killing headache, painful thumb, twisted ankle(today only) , burning eyes , I guess its fairly okay to declare today as a real damned day! Oh yes, I didn’t have lunch, breakfast this morning as well and also didn’t have dinner last night too but that’s okay, not feeling like eating at all and won’t die too if won’t eat!
In the morning itself,while getting down to the reception after receiving call that my pick up has come, I rushed over the stairs. It may sound stupid but I had a feeling that something is going to happen and it did when I lost balance over the damn stairs and ended with a twisted ankle. I guess I can blame eyes for that since they were burning already so I may have not looked at the steps carefully (but that’s not the case actually). There was already a painful right thumb thanks to the “adventure ride” of yesterday. Did I mention that day had just got started?
I am not a sort of person who would say “I don’t care” . I in fact pay attention to the minutest details of the things too and there is hardly anything which ever gets skipped from me! The same goes for the people as well around me. Anyways, so I put a lot of attention that I must make sure that things go well when I am the in-charge and I do make a very honest effort for it. And when you do all that and still has to hear that you were not good enough, it hurts! I don’t know about anyone else but it would hurt me for sure and it does as well and it did happen today when I got a comment that I am not really interactive! Huh? Even when I had no mood to talk today, I did speak so much, answered so many of the questions and did the same for all the previous days as well and still had to hear this? What for? I shall be honest, I became so upset reading that stupid comment! I normally don’t get to the level when I become completely quiet when I am upset. Even when I am upset, I shall be talking(shouting also) but won’t be quiet. But if I am quiet , it just means that now that’s the peak of the upsetness and I am out of words too to express it! I was in the same mood few hours when I was sitting in the lobby, all alone and just quiet! I was sending messages to my twitter stream but otherwise I was just quiet. I have deleted those tweets now and removed them from other streams as well since the more I am going to read them, more I am going to be upset! But it did hurt so much that someone can say just like that despite knowing that it takes a lot , a bloody LOT of effort to speak with your lungs out without even letting know that you didn’t sleep for the whole night,you didn’t eat , you are upset or happy, anything! But I guess, its too tough to control people and their sayings so I guess, I have to just bury it somewhere deep!
I am going to stop now since I got a call that my cab has come. Hope that there would not be any more upset things happening but even if they would happen, I wouldn’t be surprised , at least for today!